“”

Women's Health, Your Way

April 21, 2026

Ask & Search With Clara

Welcome to a new standard for women’s health answers.

GIRLHOOD / Re-Seeking Joy (And Trusting My Own Taste Again)

Re-Seeking Joy (And Trusting My Own Taste Again)

Re-Seeking Joy (And Trusting My Own Taste Again)

I’ll never forget when a high school acquaintance once said to me, “Kristyn, I love how you’ve always had your own personal style.” At the time, I don’t think I realized just how deeply that would stick. But even now, years later, it still feels like one of the best compliments I’ve ever received.

In my teens and early twenties, I was peak me. I spent whatever disposable income I had on Broadway tickets, wandered Strand Bookstore like it was church, and proudly carried faux designer bags from Chinatown. I flirted with trends (hi, Juicy suits and Air Jordans), but I never let them lead. I followed my instincts. I dressed, decorated, and lived for myself.

Then… social media happened. And not long after, motherhood followed.

Suddenly, there were rules. Influencers decided what was chic and what was cringe. Homes had to be aesthetic. Outfits had to be “timeless.” Even joy felt curated. This year, while decorating for Christmas with pieces I’ve collected and loved over time — items that don’t perfectly match but feel like me — I caught myself thinking: "Nothing goes together. What will people think?" (As if my family members were showing up with scorecards.)

That was the moment it clicked.

One year postpartum, emerging from a fog, exhausted by scrolling and craving something more analog and less performative, I realized my intention for the new year is simple: re-seek joy. Not the algorithm-approved kind — the kind that feels intuitive, personal, and maybe even slightly rebellious.

So far, that’s looked like wallpapering the back of a shelf in my very outdated kitchen, thrifting an Anthropologie dress for $52, and buying bold emerald green costume earrings just because they made my heart beat faster. It’s remembering that I’m a mom, yes, but I’m also someone with taste, curiosity, creativity, and a nervous system that still lights up over color, texture, and possibility.

It turns out, joy doesn’t have to match. It just has to feel like home again... and like mine.

More from GIRLHOOD

When I was maybe ten or eleven, before I knew I could write, I was convinced I was going to be a fashion designer. Or maybe a makeup artist. The... Read more
After nearly a decade in women's health, I thought I'd heard it all. And then a video stopped me mid-scroll and genuinely blew my mind. It turns out, hearing loss... Read more
I feel like the theme of this column is that I am one giant, walking contradiction. A couple of weeks ago I mentioned that I always need a book in... Read more

In Defense of "Easy IVF"

When our friend Abbie posted a video about her "easy IVF journey," I braced for the comments. And look, I get it. For a lot of people, those two words... Read more
Are we looking at ourselves too much? No, like, that's a serious question. Maybe it's the fact that I'm in my "late" 30s now. Maybe it's four hours of Zoom... Read more
Nobody warns you that your 30s are basically one long lesson in letting go of the plot you had in your head. Mine have included infertility, IVF, pregnancy loss, a... Read more
There's a specific kind of obsession that sets in after enough failed cycles — the kind where you start reading ingredient labels like they contain the answer. I know this... Read more
I was 13 when my grandfather died of a massive heart attack. The kind that doesn't give you a warning, doesn't give you time. One of those moments that rewires... Read more
My friend texted me last week: "I just shaved my entire body." I responded: "Wait, I'm literally about to do the same thing." We didn't plan this. We didn't need... Read more
Somewhere between my postpartum scalp freakout and my third Google search about whether I should be exfoliating or not, I had a realization: women's wellness doesn't have an information problem... Read more